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Looking For Quacks In The Pavement

Author: Karel Kerezman

  • Night Of The Living Dumb

    One of the other units in our little apartment complex, at some point in the last few months, became the “party place.” You know, drinking and music and groups of idiots shouting at random, that sort of thing. Generally speaking they’ve kept it reasonable; they’re usually not super-loud, and they’re dispersed by 11pm or so. It’s not my favorite thing in the world, but when kept under control I can deal with it on occasion.

    Not last night, though.

    Full-volume music. Several conversations taking place outside at full volume simultaneously. People wandering out to the street to be noisy gits. And this went on well past 11pm.

    And past midnight.

    And past 1am.

    The party didn’t wind down until two-freaking-thirty in the morning. (And it took another half hour or so for me to calm down enough to be able to sleep. Joy.)

    Icing on the cake? Eight-o’clock rolls around and one of them decides to drive somewhere… announcing this fact by blaring their car stereo for a couple of minutes before driving off.

    Yeah, they’ve had their exceptional party. I hope they enjoyed it, because if they try it again, cops will be called. Persistently and promptly. After a generally crappy week of work, this was precisely what I did not need. Grrrr.

  • The High Price Of Online Documents

    Getting the oldest child ready for college entails all of the zany fun one would expect. This weekend, for instance, we’re planning an Ikea run so he can get an idea of what sort of desk, bed and shelving he wants for his apartment space.

    Then there’s the financial aid. Due to various circumstances, I ended up being the parent doing the “Parent PLUS” loan. Okay, that’s fine, but the last stage in that process (after we emailed various PDFs and DOCs back and forth with the financial aid office) involves dealing with the StudentLoans.gov website. The idea is that one can fill out the promissory note electronically.

    Sure, you can. Riiiiight.

    Actually, we know it can be done: Wendi was able to do it just fine. Since things changed to require putting my neck in the financial noose, however, I had to go through the process as well.

    And it looked like it worked, at first… kind of. I got through it all, everything looked kosher, but when I’d go to look at the “Completed” section… nothing. I exchanged email with the financial aid office, who advised a particular method of getting results (accompanied by vague comments about how “the site’s been having problems lately,” no, really?) so I tried again. And again. Yes, I tried different browsers; this isn’t my first rodeo, Mr. Stark.

    Eventually I was given a number to call. Which was off by one digit,  so I was then given another number to call. The helpful person on the other end gave me… yet another number to call. Finally I worked with someone who could help me through the process properly. Great, now we’ll get results!

    Only, no, we didn’t. Exactly the same results, even with the expert on the phone. “Huh, that should’ve worked.” You don’t say.

    “So, what I need you to do is to print this out and overnight it to…”

    Great. Mind you, there’s nothing to print out after the process fails, so let’s go through it one more time… turn the “proof” preview into a PDF… then print that out (pages and pages of inscrutable legalese)… then visit the FedExKinkosBananaFannaFoFanna after work and spend thirty dollars to overnight the silly thing to Alabama.

    All of this over a document that was supposed to take five minutes to complete, for free, online. Ah, progress.

  • Complex Shun

    Why, at the ripe age of thirty-eight, am I still dealing with a facial complexion straight out of my teen years? Maybe I need to invest in a new brand of facial cleanser, because this morning’s acne outbreak is ridiculous. Even normally, however, I have to fight to keep this under control. I’m never going to look my age, am I…?

    I guess I truly am staying young in some fashion… other than just mentally, that is. (“Right now, I’m five.” “Oh, really.” “YES.”)

  • Sprucing Up The Place

    After months spent not doing much of anything in the way of website maintenance, I finally threw some more top-header rotation images into the queue. Most of them are earth- and space-sciences material for now. I’ll be taking more pictures this summer and plan to scour through the results for suitable material… probably more skylines and plant life, that sort of thing.

    (And what’s this? Posting two days in a row? Who’d have thunk it?)

  • Batman or Superman?

    The question was put to me recently, one which is guaranteed to spark spirited debate among a particular subset of society. (Read: Geeky types.)

    Batman? Or Superman?

    There’s no doubt that Batman is cooler. His character is the result of being able to throw vast amounts of cash and dedicated physical training and a keen intellect at any given problem. His operating mode is to gather evidence, plan carefully, and prepare for contingencies. Then, to go forth and kick copious amounts of ass.

    So, yes, he’s cooler.

    But.

    I still have a soft spot for ol’ Supes. Growing up, I dreamed of being that kind of superhero, the invincible Boy Scout. For all that I engage in the flagrant disregard for certain societal norms, I have a deeply ingrained belief that there’s a Certain Way Things Should Be. (And I try not to let that get away from me too often, because it can be a tedious thing to be around… nobody’s perfect, wot?) Not that my Way Things Should Be necessarily matches most other folks, I suppose, but hey. And Superman is the truth-and-justice guy. (Batman lives in much more of a grey area.)

    Of course, then there’s the feeling like you’re not quite like everyone else around you. You look like them, but you’re just a bit “off.” Not better, just… different. So I identify with that a bit, too.

    I guess it boils down to, I think Batman’s cooler but I like Superman more.

    Let the flamewar commence, I suppose…

  • April, Two Thousand Ten

    I sort of let things go for a month there, didn’t I?

    It’s not that it was a dull month, it’s that I lacked the energy to write about it. I mean, hey, Spud went to DigiPen a couple of weekends ago, and wasn’t that an adventure! (It doesn’t help that he misplaced his ticket info before getting on the train, then found it again at the last minute… both directions. Smart lad, but he needs some travel experience.) And there’s been game playing, and the occasional amusing outing to random parts of town (like my first trip on the Clackamas-bound leg of the Green Line MAX), but… when it comes time to either fire up the WordPress admin interface or fall into bed, guess what I’ve chosen?

    Right.

    It doesn’t help that I haven’t yet weaned myself off of Twitter. Not that I want to give it up entirely, but some stuff should go here and not there. That way I can use it best as a direct communication (and light comedy) medium, and use this for writing out the rants and raves that I was once rather good at.

    It’s a goal, anyway.

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