Fortune Favors The Cookie

Dawn shared this bit of info with me today: “So I impulse bought something today… found this mini book on how to make fortune cookies.” I teased her about it…

Her: What’s wrong with fortune cookies? Some of the ones they give are priceless *evil grin*
Me: I tremble with fear at the thought of what kinds of fortunes you might include…
Her: Liar. You do not =P
Me: *laughter* You know me too well. Actually, to be honest, what’s really sick is I want to write fortunes for your cookies.
Her: Writing fortunes for my cookies eh? What kind of fortunes?
Me: They’d probably be sort of wacky. And pre-tested for whether the addition of “in bed” makes them funny.

So here’s what I came up with on the spur of the moment…

“Admit it: You like letting someone else take charge now and then.”

“Perhaps your troubles really can be traced back to that one summer night.”

“Whatever you do, don’t squeeze the rubber ducky too tightly.”

“It can always get worse. It can also always get better.”

“You’re going to show this to all of your friends, aren’t you?”

And that’s just in a few minutes of brainstorming. So… give us a hand, would you? Let’s come up with some good fortunes for Dawn’s future cookies!

Comments

6 responses to “Fortune Favors The Cookie”

  1. GreyDuck Avatar

    As long as it’s not unmentionable material, we’ll be fine. Heh.

    P.S. I did say that in-bed enhancement would be one of the criteria. So there. Thppppt.

  2. Kim Avatar
    Kim

    “Remember to stay on top of it”

    “Some things will move to bend your way”

    “Imagine surprises await you”

  3. The Cyberwolfe Avatar
    The Cyberwolfe

    “Help me! I’m trapped in a fortune cookie factory!”

  4. Kylanath Avatar
    Kylanath

    *gives the Little Duckie a hand* You said to… so nyah! And just for that, your batch of cookies will contain the uber snarky fortunes provided as well as some unmentioned material provided by moi.

    P.S. Notice how all of those listed are better with the “in bed” addendum, especially the third one? I think we all know what word to omit from that one =)

    (Okay, okay, that was TMI there…couldn’t resist…yada yada.)

  5. Kylanath Avatar
    Kylanath

    Then I guess you won’t be sharing those fortunes with anyone, ne?? *evil smirk*

  6. Lilith Avatar
    Lilith

    How about–

    “You’re lost…but you’re making good time!” 🙂

    “There are some things for which you should not substitute vegetables.”

    “Open your mouth & close your eyes, and you will get a big surprise!”

    *snicker*