(Thanks, Lil’. Heh.)

LAYER ONE:
— Name: Karel
— Birth date: 8 March 1972
— Birthplace: Ketchikan, AK
— Current Location: Portland, OR
— Eye Color: Blue
— Hair Color: Light brown
— Height: 5’8”
— Righty or Lefty: Righty
— Zodiac Sign: Pisces (or Rat if you’re into the Chinese version)

LAYER TWO:
— Your heritage: A bit of Czech & Finn, but mostly American Mutt
— The shoes you wore today: My beat-up Rockports, as usual
— Your weakness: Heavens above, where do I start?
— Your fears: Lots of things, like bugs and other critters, and death, and being destitute and/or homeless, and my loved ones coming to serious harm, and…
— Your perfect pizza: Pizza Hut’s meat-lover’s, pan style
— Goal you’d like to achieve: Lose a few pounds

LAYER THREE:
— Your most overused phrase on IM: Any of the actions… *shrug* and *smirk* and such
— Your first waking thoughts: Do I have to?
— Your best physical feature: I have no idea…
— Your most missed memory: How can you remember a missed memory?

LAYER FOUR:
— Pepsi or Coke: No
— McDonald’s or Burger King: BK, but only for the double cheeseburger plain with bacon
— Single or group dates: Yes
— Adidas or Nike: No
— Lipton Ice Tea or Nestea: No
— Chocolate or vanilla: Chocolate
— Cappuccino or coffee: No

LAYER FIVE:
— Smoke: No
— Cuss: What the f—- makes you think I f—-ing cuss, you s—-head? 😉
— Sing: Badly, and infrequently
— Take a shower everyday: If at all possible
— Do you think you’ve been in love: Yes, lots
— Want to go to college: Not really
— Liked high school: Only in my Junior year. Dammit.
— Want to get married: Been there done that got the alimony payments. =)
— Believe in yourself: That I exist? Sure. Ask me if I believe in God, next.
— Get motion sickness: Yes
— Think you’re attractive: Not so much
— Think you’re a health freak: Hah! Pasta and pizza and chocolate, oh my!
— Get along with your parent(s): If you call “being in contact about once a year” getting along, sure.
— Like thunderstorms: Ooooo, yes. Yes indeedy. Hell, I’d be a storm chaser if I but lived in the right part of the country.
— Play an instrument: No

LAYER SIX: In the past month…
— Drank alcohol: No
— Smoked: No
— Done a drug: I tried Claritin, and I think it worked.
— Made Out: Has it been a month? Damn.
— Gone on a date: Yes
— Gone to the mall?: Yes
— Eaten an entire box of Oreos?: No, not since I was a very small boy.
— Eaten sushi: No
— Been on stage: No
— Been dumped: No
— Gone skating: No
— Made homemade cookies: No
— Gone skinny dipping: No
— Dyed your hair: No
— Stolen Anything: No, and what teenaged girl dreamed up this list, anyway?

LAYER SEVEN: Ever…
— Played a game that required removal of clothing: Yes
— If so, was it mixed company: Yes
— Been trashed or extremely intoxicated: I’ve been drunk once in my life. That was before I was a teenager, actually.
— Been caught “doing something”: No, assuming you mean what I think you mean. If you mean “having sex,” why don’t you just say so?
— Been called a tease: From time to time…
— Gotten beaten up: Yes (see: “high school,” above)
— Shoplifted: No
— Changed who you were to fit in: I’ve never fit in. Tried to, but no.

LAYER EIGHT:
— Age you hope to be married: *grumble* This question’s another example of teenaged-girl authorship. Bleh.
— Numbers and Names of Children: Numbers, plural? Anyway: Two, Alexander and Erica
— Describe your Dream Wedding: One which I wake from, screaming.
— How do you want to die: Preferably never, but if I must, make it quick.
— What do you want to be when you grow up: Preferably never, but if I must… oh wait, I already am what I want to be, for the most part. So there!
— What country would you most like to visit: Japan. Failing that, the UK.

LAYER NINE:
— Number of drugs taken illegally: None, but once when I was a kid Mom tried to get me high on pot so I wouldn’t get carsick anymore. I politely declined. I’ve also never been carsick since…
— Number of people I could trust with my life: 4, at least. Maybe more.
— Number of CDs that I own: Somewhere in excess of 300. Probably closer to 400.
— Number of piercings: Zero
— Number of times my name has appeared in the newspaper: Zero
— Number of scars on my body: The only surgical scar I’m aware of having may have healed to nothingness by now. Maybe I should check that. Any volunteers to help? *smirk*
— Number of things in my past that I regret: Plenty, but I try not to spend time actually dwelling on them.