So I was chatting this afternoon with someone who mentioned that in a particular movie they’d seen very recently, one of the lead characters used the butt end of a bladed weapon to hit his opponent. I was instantly reminded of one more bit of pain from my new least-favorite movie. (See two entries down, if you’re new here.)
At what point did swords become blunt instruments? When you give someone a sword and place them in harm’s way, surrounded by armed opponents who are (presumably) trying to kill the aforementioned someone… why does that someone not use the dangerous part of the weapon against those opponents? I’ve lost track of how many times a supposedly-intelligent hero grabs a sword, bangs it against the other guy’s sword a few times and then proceeds to either kick, punch or bludgeon the other guy, often with the pommel of his sword. I’m not impressed.
At first we only saw this sort of thing in TV shows of the “Saturday Afternoon Special” variety. You know, Hercules and Beastmaster and, oh, a bunch of other craptacular shows whose names escape me. Apparently it’s catching on in moviemaking, though, a trend that only fills me with dread as political correctness wins out over anything resembling suspension of disbelief.
Please don’t give me any nonsense about reducing the level of violence for the sake of the younger viewers, either. All you’re teaching the kiddies is that swords are perfectly safe and can’t hurt anybody. Oh, and that heroes are phenomenally stupid gits who carry the day with sheer luck and a sprinkling of charm. If you want to protect the children from violence, make sure they don’t watch violent shows. It’s a radical notion, to be sure.
I’m not asking for blood and guts. I would, however, like at least the illusion that enemies are being dispatched through something resembling sensible use of the weapons at hand. Perhaps I’m expecting too much of my mindless fantasy entertainment…
Comments
7 responses to “Trade that thing in for some brass knuckles, moron.”
That’s not the point, though. Hell, the Highlander TV series managed to dispatch folks with swords all the time without showing blood-n-guts. They at least maintained the _illusion_ that the swords were being used as intended.
I hate to tell you this, but that is a perfectly legitimate use of the weapon. There are certain moves (both attack and defense) that leave either the blade out of line or your body too close to use the blade, in which case you make use of what you got. It is also useful when fighting to subdue your oponnent rather than kill.
Most people also don’t realize that only the first 6 inches of blade matter in a stab; after that, it has passed through any major organs and further penetration is just grandstanding.
That’s a good point, D. (Yes, yes, everyone wants to take a piece out of me when I do a rant.) My point, such as it was, is the rampant silliness of the way it’s done on TV lately. It’s become predictable: Clang, clang, kick. Clang, clang, punch. Lather, rinse, repeat. Booooooring.
If this is what’s become of fight choreography lately… I’ll be over here, reading a good book.
(Browsing through here…)
Interesting story for you. Way back when I used to take classes in fencing. (Got pretty good at it too.) Now there are three classes of blade in fencing, foil, where only strikes with the point of the blade to the torso count, saber, where points are scored with the edge and the point to anywhere above the waist, and epee, where any part of the blade can score on any part of the opponent. Fencing, being fairly strictured into a sport instead of actual sword-fighting, has suffered numerous weird assaults from the “it doesn’t say we CAN’T do that” group, including the Japanese epee team who discovered it was legal to dive forward at the start of the match and try to stab their opponent in the feet on the way down. When they hit the mat, they’re counted as “fallen”, the match stops and starts over again.
The most famous one I know of, though, was a friend of a friend in saber who, as soon as the match started, would charge forward, smack the opponent’s blade aside, and punch the opponent as hard as he could in the head with his bellguard. The opponent falls down, so the match is stopped. No point is scored, they go back to the starting lines. Repeat until the opponent throws the match by not getting up. Apparently, before they quickly altered the rules to make that illegal, he’d come back from matches with his bellguard bent all the way into his knuckles.
Though rather foolhardy, it would be a perfectly legitimate move in an actual swordfight.
(a) realistic use of the pommel as a weapon: the princess bride. (i would as soon destroy a stained glass window as an artist like yourself)
(b) have you seen rob roy? that’s a sword fight. *flinch*
That sure suck alright. It means no incredibly fake looking movie-blood, which we all know can make or break a movie.
I wish I had a sword so I could learn usefull facts like that. Sharp pointy things rock.