A longtime denizen of animemusicvideos.org, the guy known as MCWagner likes to do movie reviews. Often they’re of semi-obscure horror flicks, but recently he took on X2 and the new Matrix flick. His capsule review reads,

I liked the film, but it wasnít nearly as well crafted as the first, and they kept all the parts I disliked while getting rid of some of those I liked. Watch it for the fights, bring a book to occupy time during the philosophizing, and get ready to cover juniorís eyes during the sex.

But that’s not the funny part, the part that inspired me to log into my website at 12:30 in the freakin’ Ay Em. That would be this bit, describing what should have happened during one philosophical stop-down:

… and then lectures them for fifteen minutes on causality while causing a woman at another table to remote-orgasm in wireframe (THATíLL keep the audience awake). Through the whole speech, our three heroes just sit there, emotions concealed behind opaque shades, entirely motionless. I was half expecting Keanu to lean over to Morpheus:

N: Psssst. Whatís going on?
M: I have no idea.
N: Is there gonna be a test on this?
M: I hope not. I was only watching when he lit off that girl.
N: Yeah, she was hot, wasnít she?
M: I bet I could get Niobe back with a piece of that cake.

Ahh, priceless. Oddly enough, now I actually want to see this movie… so I can mentally insert that bit of dialog at the appropriate moment.

What? C’mon, people. You knew I was a very silly person, didn’t you? Hmm?