Category: Work

  • Mouse Identification Training

    The product is called “VMware.” It is, in effect, a server that allows you to host a number of virtual computers on a single machine. The geek value for something like this is through the roof, which makes the following instructions found in the upgrade documentation terribly amusing.

    8. Select your mouse.

    Here are some helpful mouse identification hints:

    • If the connector is round, your mouse is a PS/2 or a Bus mouse.
    • If the connector is trapezoidal with nine holes, it is a serial mouse.
    • If the connector is a flat rectangle with a slot, it is a USB mouse.

    I’ll grant you that their instructions are wholly accurate. However, I question the judgement of the person who thinks (s)he has any business at all installing or upgrading a sophisticated piece of software but doesn’t know how to tell one type of pointing device from another!

  • Bizarre Coincidence, Wot?

    This week marks the 17th anniversary of my arrival in Portland. I moved here from Concrete, WA when I was 17 years old, so I’ve made the Rose City my home for an entire half of my life now. Before Concrete (the town in which I spent my senior year) I spent a brief time in Anacortes, WA preceeded by another brief stint in Des Moines, WA. Oddly enough, my girlfriend currently lives in Des Moines, albeit not on a small boat like I did. My junior year (and my absolute favorite year of school, ever) was spent in Bellevue, WA and my sophomore year took place in Kent, WA.

    We moved to Kent from Hillsboro, OR after Mom hooked up with her newest husband at the time. Now, here’s where it gets weird. I attended Poynter Middle School, located just off Cornell Road. Our apartment was right across Cornell from the school’s athletic field. (I used to watch Robotech in the morning until the moment the credits rolled, at which point I’d grab my things and scamper at high speed so as not to be late for school.)

    Yesterday I started work at Resource One, which is located… well, let’s just say it’s incredibly close. Check this out:


    (Image courtesy of Google Maps, with minor edits by Yours Truly)

    The green arrow is my current workplace. The blue arrow marks the approximate location (it was a long time ago, so maybe I got the wrong building) of the apartment that Mom, Sis and I lived in… about twenty years ago. The purple arrow indicates the middle school I attended at that time. (For reference, if you could “scroll” the image above so you could see what’s just off to the right, you’d find the Hillsboro airport.)

    Consider that I’ve barely set foot in Hillsboro more than a couple of times since I moved away, and then consider that I’m now working a figurative stone’s throw from where I used to live. Freaky, isn’t it?

  • Morning person? Me?

    I face a number of challenges in my new job. For instance, I need to learn one arcane system around which our tasking and billing revolve and another slightly less arcane system around which my primary job description revolves. I also need to learn and become comfortable with the process by which I accept, resolve and document individual tasks. There’s also the matter of tracking what I’m doing (and for whom) for any given quarter-hour of the workday.

    All of this pales in comparison to my biggest challenge, however. You see, it turns out that my schedule is to work from 8:00am to 5:00pm each weekday. Factor in the hour and a half of transit time (walk to MAX station, wait for and catch MAX, ride MAX for about 50 minutes, walk from station to office) and that means I need to get out of bed no later than twenty minutes after five o’clock in the morning.

    5:20 in the A.M.? Are you kidding me? I’m going to be a zombie! I may be getting home at nearly the same time that I used to when I worked at “that other place,” but I’m getting out of bed a whole two hours earlier.

    Well, maybe I’ll adjust beautifully. I won’t know until I try. Suffice to say that the prospect is daunting, which when added to all of the other daunting parts of my new job results in my having to fight down the occasional wave of feeling utterly out of my depth.

    We’ll find out, won’t we?

  • Employed!

    No more “unenjoyment” for this little grey duck! I just received and accepted a job offer, and I will probably start work Wednesday morning. I’ll go into more detail about the gig itself when (and if) I’m sure it’s appropriate to do so, but suffice to say that it’s an in-the-office job managing servers and systems from an administrative and troubleshooting standpoint, and serving as a “first contact” support mechanism for clients. The pay is comfortable, the job will be challenging (in terms of both initial adjustment and long-term activities) and I get to set the standard (and develop the processes) for what amounts to a new kind of job position within the company.

    I have some experience with that sort of thing. This time around I know what to look for right from the get-go, however. For instance, I’m already thinking about how I’m going to document… everything. (You think I’m kidding. Hah!)

    Maybe my overall stress levels won’t go down very much in the immediate future, but at least it’s a positive kind of stress, the “do I really think I can do this?” kind instead of the “I’m doomed I’m doomed I’m doomed” kind. Three and a half months of “I’m doomed” really took the joy out of life. I want my joy back.

    (Hey, maybe in a few weeks I’ll be able to afford more RAM for this webserver. Cool.)

    Bye bye, job hunting. Hello, new challenge!

  • Please. Hire me!

    To Whom It May Concern:

    Perhaps your company or similar organization requires someone of considerable skill with computer technology. I humbly submit that if your needs are either strongly in the area of workgroup server administration, email administration, end-user desktop support, webserver administration or just plain “anything with a keyboard and mouse attached,” and you’re located in the City of Roses or thereabouts, I’m the guy you’re looking for.

    I spent nine solid years learning what it takes to keep servers and workstations running for an office of a couple hundred souls, as well as how to keep those souls in tune with their computers. I also consider myself quite wise to the needs of business, and tend to take the long and wide view of the process of change.

    Here I present just a few of many highlights from my previous work engagement as a one-man IT department for most of a decade:

    • Planned, tested and implemented company-wide in-house audio streaming system that has seen steady use for several years with very little downtime or maintenance.
    • Converted wholesale three entire email systems, one after another as we acquired other companies, to the corporate WAN-based email operation.
    • Served as hostmaster for the company’s banner website, rapidly providing an urgently needed solution followed by many years of solid performance and availability.
    • Implemented security, process and documentation changes bringing systems up to Sarbanes/Oxley compliance.
    • Developed web-based documentation and information dissemination system in cooperation with the General Managers’ staff.
    • Successfully rolled out web browser software changes that led to a near-total elimination of adware, spyware and other malicious bits of code from end-user desktops over the course of a mere few months.
    • Created numerous small quality-of-life features that, while not taking an inordinate amount of time to develop, scratched the itches of several high-profile groups within the company.
    • Provided valuable specialized knowledge (such as in the areas of web development and Linux operating system arcana) to branches outside the local operation as well as to the corporate office itself.

    My specific product experience is with a mixture of Novell’s Netware server and GroupWise email products, several flavors of Linux including Debian, RedHat/Fedora and Ubuntu, Symantec’s Corporate Edition anti-virus products, Windows 2000 Server, the Apache webserver platform including MySQL and PHP, and providing Windows desktop support over the usual variety of versions from 95 through XP. When you get right down to it, there’s very little I can’t learn in a reasonably short time, and I have a knack for “making it work” when things are going strange.

    If you think I might be a good fit for your organization, or if you just want to find out if I’m really as good as I like to think I am, please take a moment to pen a quick email addressed to “greyduck” at “gmail.com” and I’ll answer any questions or place any call or meet any time you like. (I apologize for the lack of clickable or copy-and-paste-able address, but one can’t be too careful about junk email these days, can one?)

    To you, prospective employer, and to all of my readers, I offer thanks for your time and indulgence, and I bid you a good day.

  • It doesn’t get much worse.

    I just got the call. I’ve been let go.

    My cellphone will go away shortly. My access to servers and what-not will go away. Oh, yeah, that means this website and a number of others hosted on this server will probably go away. That includes my email account, as well as others’ email accounts. If things suddenly vanish… you’ll know why.

    And I have no good prospects, and I do not look good on paper, and I have no idea what I’m going to do now.

    Wish me luck. I could certainly use some, for a change.