Looking For Quacks In The Pavement

Category: Memes (Page 3 of 24)

San Jacinto

Via everywhere on the Internet, but specifically average bear, comes this “amusing” excuse to exercise my newly-created rock-and-roll playlist…

Instructions: Use your media player set to random to answer the questions with random song titles.

What does next year have in store for me?
Candle (“just take this candle / it’s the one you gave to me / it has enough light / just enough to torture me” … Oh, goody.)
What does my love life look like?
Airhead (I’m sorry, what? Apparently this meme hasn’t met my girlfriends.)
What do I say when life gets hard?
Concrete (“Concrete you don’t free my soul” … I have no idea what that’s supposed to mean.)
What do I think of when I get up in the morning?
Get Down Make Love (Er. Ahem. Never you mind, you sickos.)
What song will I dance to at my wedding?
Behind The Wheel (Wedding? Hah!)
What do I want for my career?
Army Of Me (“you’re on your own now / we won’t save you / your rescue squad / is too exhausted” … This meme isn’t exactly batting cleanup, is it?)
Favorite saying?
Diamonds Aren’t So Hard (It’s one of my favorite tracks on Tony Banks’ “Bankstatement” album, but as a saying? Not so much. “So come with me / where dragons rule the air / and diamonds aren’t so hard to find…”)
Favorite place?
Whoah (“whoah oh / don’t wanna see you back here again / whoah oh” … Well, I’m bewildered. How about you?)
What do I think of my parents?
You May Not Be Released (One last Oils song for the list. So much for Winamp’s randomizer. Note my lack of comment on the actual song selection…)
Where would I go on a first date?
Heat (“better run while you can / better set the tall sail / better make deep cover / before the boys have you nailed” … What any given Jethro Tull song has to do with dating is anyone’s guess, let alone this one from the spy-movie-themed “Under Wraps” album.)
Drug of Choice?
Flames (“when I am with you / there’s no reason to pretend that / when I am with you / I feel flames again” … No additional comment should be necessary, especially if you know the rest of the lyrics. Ahem.)
How do I describe myself?
Going Under (Last summer, maybe. Since last fall I’ve been trying to come back up again…)
What is the thing I like doing the most?
King Nothing (“wish I may, wish I might / have this wish, I wish tonight / I want that star, I want it now / I want it all and I don’t care how” … Look, I don’t know. I just like that snippet of lyric.)
What is my state of mind like at the moment?
Anybody Listening (“is there anybody listening? / is there anyone that sees what’s going on? / read between the lines / criticize the words they’re selling” … Maybe “at the moment” isn’t accurate, but… sure.)
How will I die?
I Don’t Care Anymore (“I won’t be there anymore / get out of my way / let me by / I got better things to do with my time / I don’t care anymore” … Er, huh?)
Song they’ll play at my funeral?
Metropolis (“there’ll never be another quite like you / I’m so involved with everything you do / don’t say nothing good will ever come of this / don’t say the damage is worse than it is” … Well, it could’ve been worse. Hmm.)
What song will I put as the subject?
San Jacinto (“we will walk – on the land / we will breathe – of the air / we will drink – from the stream / we will live – hold the line”)

Gone Completely (Map)Loco

Well, everyone else is jumping off the cliff doing one of these so I might as well join in. Mind you I will probably just leave the silly thing in this entry so eventually it’ll scroll right off the main page…

Visitor Map
Create your own visitor map!

I have some non-meme content in the works, but I’m not promising a delivery time. Thank you for your patience while I get my life back in order.

Genre Books Meme

Via your average bear:

Bold the ones you’ve read, strike-out the ones you hated, italicize those you started but never finished and put an asterisk beside the ones you loved.

1. The Lord of the Rings, J.R.R. Tolkien
2. The Foundation Trilogy, Isaac Asimov
3. Dune, Frank Herbert
4. Stranger in a Strange Land, Robert A. Heinlein (No, but I have read Time Enough For Love as well as Job.)
5. A Wizard of Earthsea, Ursula K. Le Guin
6. Neuromancer, William Gibson (I’m sorry, folks. As a card carrying techie I’m supposed to love this one, but I just couldn’t get into it. Gibson’s style annoyed me.)
7. Childhood’s End, Arthur C. Clarke
8. Do Androids Dream of Electric Sheep?, Philip K. Dick
9. The Mists of Avalon, Marion Zimmer Bradley (I tried, Lil’. I really, really tried.)
10. Fahrenheit 451, Ray Bradbury
11. The Book of the New Sun, Gene Wolfe
12. A Canticle for Leibowitz, Walter M. Miller, Jr.
13. The Caves of Steel, Isaac Asimov
14. Children of the Atom, Wilmar Shiras
15. Cities in Flight, James Blish
16. The Colour of Magic, Terry Pratchett
17. Dangerous Visions, edited by Harlan Ellison
18. Deathbird Stories, Harlan Ellison
19. The Demolished Man, Alfred Bester
20. Dhalgren, Samuel R. Delany
21. Dragonflight, Anne McCaffrey * (Pern books are my anti-drug. Well, at least up through Skies. After that, fuggeddaboutit.)
22. Ender’s Game, Orson Scott Card
23. The First Chronicles of Thomas Covenant the Unbeliever, Stephen R. Donaldson (Donaldson’s only enjoyable work is the Mordant’s Need set, and maybe the Gap series if you like really grim Sci-Fi.)
24. The Forever War, Joe Haldeman
25. Gateway, Frederik Pohl
26. Harry Potter and the Philosopher’s Stone, J.K. Rowling
27. The Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy, Douglas Adams *
28. I Am Legend, Richard Matheson
29. Interview with the Vampire, Anne Rice (Oddly enough, I read Queen of the Damned first. Take pity on my soul.)
30. The Left Hand of Darkness, Ursula K. Le Guin
31. Little, Big, John Crowley
32. Lord of Light, Roger Zelazny (No, but I’ve read the Amber series. Ugh.)
33. The Man in the High Castle, Philip K. Dick
34. Mission of Gravity, Hal Clement
35. More Than Human, Theodore Sturgeon
36. The Rediscovery of Man, Cordwainer Smith
37. On the Beach, Nevil Shute
38. Rendezvous with Rama, Arthur C. Clarke *
39. Ringworld, Larry Niven (It’s on my list.)
40. Rogue Moon, Algis Budrys
41. The Silmarillion, J.R.R. Tolkien (I own an old, old copy… thanks Dad!)
42. Slaughterhouse-5, Kurt Vonnegut
43. Snow Crash, Neal Stephenson
44. Stand on Zanzibar, John Brunner
45. The Stars My Destination, Alfred Bester
46. Starship Troopers, Robert A. Heinlein
47. Stormbringer, Michael Moorcock
48. The Sword of Shannara, Terry Brooks (At least, I vaguely recall having started it once. Maybe I even finished it. Hmm.)
49. Timescape, Gregory Benford
50. To Your Scattered Bodies Go, Philip Jose Farmer

Every time a bell rings, an angel gets his grey duck.

Happy 2007, everybody. I know, I sort of left things hanging around here for the last few days of 2006 but when you get right down to it, there wasn’t much to say. I don’t want to look back on that particular run of twelve months. Not that it was all bad. Some of it was quite good. However, long stretches of it were absolutely dreadful. So, good riddance.

And now for something completely silly. At one of my favorite website stops I found an amusing new toy. I plugged in a specific (and perhaps unsurprising) sequence of letters and what follows are many of the results. Please note that I’ve taken a bit of liberty with the formatting, using the two separate words or my Internet nickname form depending on which amuses me more. (It’s all about my amusement, dammit.) Can you name the movies?

  • I know this sounds crazy, but ever since yesterday on the road, I’ve been seeing this grey duck.
  • Why don’t you come up sometime and see GreyDuck?
  • We’ll always have GreyDuck.
  • Frankly, my dear, I don’t give a grey duck.
  • You had me at ‘grey duck’.
  • I do wish we could chat longer, but I’m having an old grey duck for dinner.
  • I always say a kiss on the hand might feel very good, but a grey duck lasts forever.
  • You can’t handle the grey duck!
  • Love means never having to say you’re GreyDuck.
  • We can’t stop here. This is grey duck country.
  • Gort! Klaatu barada GreyDuck!
  • It is too late, my grey duck is in your veins.
  • That grey duck is the pure, physical manifestation of Sadako’s hatred.
  • There is a grey duck coming. Are you sure you’re on the right side?
  • I am the author. You are the grey duck. I outrank you!
  • I feel the need – the need for GreyDuck!
  • Soylent Green is GreyDuck!
  • I love the smell of grey duck in the morning.
  • Fear leads to anger. Anger leads to hate. Hate leads to grey duck.
  • I say we take off and nuke the entire grey duck from orbit.
  • If you build it, GreyDuck will come.
  • Hasta la vista, GreyDuck.
  • I’ll get you, my pretty, and your little grey duck, too!

I love that last one! After all, I am “the little grey duck.” Ha!

The First Sentence Meme

Now’s as good a time as any for a silly meme, seeing as how I haven’t done one in a little while, and also seeing as how I seem to be all out of posting inspiration. Call it the post-BloPoMo slump. Call it Eloise for all I care, really. Anyway, here goes:

Post the first sentence from the first entry of each month this year.

JAN: “I set myself a modest goal, three hundred sixty five days or so ago, of posting entries on at least 95% of the days of the calendar year and getting the overall site posting rate up into the upper 60 percent range (at the time it was at about 63%).” (Remember when I accomplished my personal goals? Ah, those were the days.)

FEB: “I didn’t set out to spend a week avoiding my writing duties.” (Thus begins one of the most-commented-upon posts of my entire journal, in which I detail my experience with an IM spammer.)

MAR: “I went to several minutes’ work to create this little monstrosity for a comment on a LiveJournal entry, so by golly I’m going to inflict it on… I mean, share it with my adoring fans.” (I filked, sort of. This is back before I lost my job and, thus, any desire to create much of anything.)

APR: “Twice in the last twelve hours I’ve called the (polite, efficient, helpful) Dedicated Hosting support techs at Infinity Internet (our new hosts!) to reboot this webserver.” (It took moving to yet another server, several months later, to make the worst of our website problems go away.)

MAY: “To Whom It May Concern: Perhaps your company or similar organization requires someone of considerable skill with computer technology.” (The “please hire me!” posting. I was sliding rapidly toward complete despair at this point.)

JUN: “Because Lil’ did it, and because I haven’t posted in a while, and because… well, meh.” (It was a meme post. Go figure.)

JUL: “No more “unenjoyment” for this little grey duck!” (This may be the happiest post in my entire year.)

AUG: “If you catch the killer, red-handed even, and it’s a hot day in late July, and you gun him down (you’ll figure out how to make it look like self defense later)… …does that make it a summer-y execution?” (As George Carlin once quipped, “These are the thoughts that kept me out of the really good schools.” Yes, I think of stuff like this all the time. You’d see more of it here if I could remember any of it long enough to get to a computer…)

SEP: “Via collision detection, I bring you the results of my recent fiddling about with the Official Seal Generator.” (It’s a fun toy, what can I say?)

OCT: “I flaked, oh yes indeed, on the real-life update thing.” (Understatement of the decade.)

NOV: “Wait, what? It’s November already?” (One exclamation, one sentence. So what?)

DEC: “So, after a solid 30 days’ posting, I decided to take a few days off.” (The first sentence in the previous post, no less. Heh.)

And because I adore you people, I’ll crank out another posting later on today. Who rocks the Casbah, baby? (Speaking of which: Do people actually have problems with that line from The Clash’s most famous song? Because, you know, I keep hearing an idiotic commercial on the radio, and, huh? If you think they’re singing about a catbox, you need professional help.)

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