• What is one thing you don’t like about your body? – I have to pick one thing? Okay, then, I hate my teeth. I really do. Bleah.
  
• What are two things you love about your body? – You’re kidding, right?
  
• What are three things you want to change about your home? – We want a new fridge, we want to completely “rebuild” the deck area in the back yard, and we want high speed internet access somehow. Anyhow.
  
• What are four books you want to read this year? – I don’t know yet. Just give me something I haven’t read before that doesn’t suck. Four somethings new, if we want to follow the spirit of the question.
  
• What are five promises you have kept to yourself? – I don’t make promises, least of all to myself.
  

Now, if you’ll excuse me, I’ll go back to watching paint dry. I mean, watching the Quantum piece of crap Snap useless damned Server as it rebuilds its spare drive. It should be done in another two hours or so…
Friday Five

• Where do you currently work? – I wonder how many of my fellow “bloggers” will answer this question, given the recent publicized firings of people who write about their workplace in their journals. Anyway… I work for the Entercom radio stations in Portland, Oregon.
  
• How many other jobs have you had and where? – Surprisingly few. My first job was at the Burgerville in St. Johns (right at the end of the bridge… I love that bridge…), then I worked at the Radio Shack on Division near I-205, then at the now-closed Oregon Stamp & Stationery. Yes, it’s a short resume. I like to think that it shows a willingness to stick with a job through thick and thin. Positive spin, baby.
  
• What do you like best about your job? – I’m lord of my own domain, within certain limitations. I have almost complete autonomy, the trust from most of my superiors that I know what the hell I’m doing so they leave me alone while I do it. I also have plenty of time to tinker, experiment and otherwise expand my horizons. And working in radio means that it’s never boring. Frustrating at times, but all jobs are that way, aren’t they?
  
• What do you like least about your job? – Radio is made up of egos and “beautiful people.” I am not powerful, famous or beautiful, therefore I have nobody to talk to most days. It’s absolutely amazing how alone I feel most days. Mind you, I like solitude and being left to my own devices most of the time, but then there are the times when I want to actually socialize (gasp!) with my coworkers and find myself ignored or actively snubbed. It takes some of the shine off of an otherwise-splendid job. Maybe if I took up drinking and/or watched a lot of sports on television… no, sorry, I don’t think so!
  
• What is your dream job? – I have a hard time imagining what it could be, since what I have is pretty close to a dream job already. Even on the worst days I have to thank whatever powers drive the cosmos that I have this job. I know full well that there are thousands of people in the Portland Metro area alone who would gleefully slit throats to get a job like this one.

Friday Five

So once again I am bowing to peer pressure. What can I say? I’m weak. And Lil’ told me to. I quote: “You should post your answers on your journal, too. No, really.”

If you want to read my snarky answers to the longest, silliest survey to worm its way around the Internet in months, here you go.

And just because I’m evil, I “asked” Andrew Wolfe (from my NaNoWriMo novel) to “answer” the “survey” (whoops, got carried away with quote marks…) as well. Here’s his version.

As Mari has already pointed out, this may be the lamest Friday Five of all time. So instead of merely complaining, I’m going to have a bit of fun with it. Afterward, if I can be bothered, I’ll submit some questions of my own. But first…

• Where are you right now? – In a galaxy known to Earthlings as The Milky Way. I think Earthlings have serious candy bar issues.
  
• What time is it? – About ten billion years since the formation of this iteration of the Cosmos. Give or take a few. (I lost count, okay? It could happen to anybody.)
  
• What are you wearing? – Clothing. It may be optional, but I’ve always believed that “clothes doth oft proclaim the man.” Polonious may have been a windbag, but he managed to stumble across a few good truths.
  
• Any people or animals around you? Describe them. – You don’t have the time. No, really. We’d be here for centuries.
  
• What are your plans for the weekend? – Didn’t you ask this question last week?

Friday Five

• Do you wear any jewelry? What kind? – No.
  
• How often do you wear it? – Uh, no.
  
• Do you have any piercings? If so, where? – No.
  
• Do you have any tattoos? If so, where? – No.
  
• What are your plans for the weekend? – No. Er, wait. Quite the sharp left turn, eh? My plans for the weekend involve staying home to watch the rugrats while Wendi does her gig tomorrow, then staying home some more on Sunday. Do I know how to live, or what?

Friday Five