Author: Karel Kerezman

  • Bad Puppy.

    Here’s another exercise in having characters flap their gums at one another. Enjoy!


    “It got away from you, didn’t it?”

    I turned at the sound of David’s voice. I knew he was there; I’d sensed his arrival a few minutes before but wasn’t in the frame of mind to greet him properly. “I suppose you could say that, yes.”

    “I suppose I just did.”

    “Hah. Clever man.”

    He gestured in the direction of the valley floor, visible through the blackened remains of once-proud evergreen trees. “Was it worth it?”

    “I don’t know. Maybe not.”

    “You’d better damned well know.”

    I sighed. “No, it wasn’t.”

    “Good. I just wanted to hear you say it.”

    “Go to hell.”

    “I live there, remember?”

    “Right.” Nobody is ever really in the mood to have their nose rubbed in their mistakes, and I’m honest enough with myself to admit that I’m touchier about that sort of thing than most people. “Okay, you’ve made your point. Do you suppose you could go bug somebody else for a while?”

    “No, I don’t think so.”

    “You’re all heart.”

    “Uh huh. Don’t you know it.”

    “Look, David. Could I really have done it any differently? They were messing about with forces they couldn’t begin to understand, yet, let alone control properly.”

    “And that’s a good excuse to break cover, make an ass of yourself showing off, and escalate the situation beyond all reason?” This normally quiet-spoken man, my opposite number, my secret co-conspirator, was almost shouting at me now. “Look at this! Look what you’ve done, you jackass.”

    “I can see it well enough, thank you.”

    “You’re going to remember this day, right?”

    “I haven’t forgotten anything, at all, since the day I was made what I am. You know that.”

    “Well, good. Because there’s nobody left to forgive you, so you’d better damned well not forget.” Quietly now, David asked, “Didn’t you see it coming?”

    I shook my head. “I should have. I… got carried away. Caught up in it. I was angry, more than anything else.”

    “I’d have thought that Lynn’s imbroglio with that research lab would’ve taught you a thing or two. Puck’s perverted pickle, man, you’re the one who stopped her! You know what happens when you can’t walk away from a fight that you start on principle and feed with rage.”

    “I know. I know.”

    “Oh, you do now, I bet.” He waited, but I had no reply. “You’ve got to do better than this. There’s too much at stake.”

    That, I could answer. “This will not happen again.”

    “It had better damned well not. We can’t afford for you to be doing the demons’ work.”

    As I looked down from the mountain at a world stripped of all animal life, all I could do was shake my head. The tears didn’t come until later.

  • Happiness Is Canned Food

    Second breakfast, this morning, consisted of a can of Chef Boyardee ravioli. I had to give serious thought to actually buying the stuff, considering past experience, but I’m glad I did. It hit the spot rather nicely.

    I’ve got the place to myself, today, at least for a while. Not that this is much of a boon considering that I’m generally glued to my desk for the next twenty hours, but hey, I won’t turn down peace and quiet either. (Not, mind you, that my roomie or his progeny are horrible to have around!)

    Now that I’ve cranked out a music review, I’m going to take a stab at some creative writing for the next posting. Wish me luck, kids.

  • Puzzle

    In 1992, KGON still played new music by newer bands, and I was a board-op on the weekends. In among the Nirvana and Pearl Jam tracks was a snarky, upbeat little piece by a band you probably haven’t heard of. The band is Dada, and the song “Dizz Knee Land” is from their debut album, “Puzzle.” When KGON went all-classic-rock, the other board-op and I (whatever happened to Loren, anyway, I wonder?) raided the music library (with permission, mind you) for stuff they weren’t going to play anymore, and I picked up one of the copies of the album.

    I can’t really explain why I like this one so much. It’s not really my normal style, being a sort of laid back California sound, mostly low-key, and not exactly the cheeriest record ever made. There’s a haunting beauty to tracks like “Surround,” “Dorina” and “Here Today Gone Tomorrow,” as well as a quirky sense of humor that shows up in the lyrics of the aforementioned single as well as the sexy romp “Posters” and odd fare like “Dog” and “Timothy,” one of my favorite tracks.

    I’ve uploaded and linked the promo I made, so you can hear bits of four tracks: “Dizz Knee Land,” “Mary Sunshine Rain,” “Surround,” and “Who You Are.” And if you decide to pick up “Puzzle” and wonder what other albums to buy, I heartily recommend their self-titled 1998 album. The only other one of their I own is “American Highway Flower,” which I’m not completely sold on. Don’t let that stop you from trying it out yourself, mind you.

    (Say, what do you know? I got the entire review done in time for the 9:30 posting. Go, me!)

    Dada – Puzzle promo

  • First promo almost complete…

    Hey, did you know that you can still sign up to be a sponsor? See this post for the how-to. I’m at just under $100 total (official) sponsorships, so maybe you can be the one who pushes it over into triple-digit territory. C’mon, you know you wanna.

    In other news, the promo is 3/4 complete. If all goes well, I should have it uploaded by the next posting.

    In other other news, there’s enough light outside that I was able to turn off my indoor lights and thus give the webcam slightly better lighting to work with. Yay, and stuff.

  • Ogg in Cool Edit & Audition!

    Continuing on from my previous entry, I have another useful link for you: The Ogg Vorbis filter for Cool Edit Pro/2000 and their successor, Adobe’s Audition.

    I’m learning how to do multitrack editing in Cool Edit 2000. It’s not wholly intuitive, but then again I haven’t played with very many other multitrack audio editing systems either. I imagine I’ll get the hang of it soon enough. I’ve already placed my synthesized voice bits and the first music segment. Now I just need to drop in a few more snippets, get the crossfades right, mix it down to an MP3, upload the file, and… oh yeah, write up a review.

    Have I gotten myself in over my head? Maybe, but I look at it this way: I shouldn’t run out of Blogathon entries any time soon!

  • Talk To Me

    Part of my geeky little plan to do “album promos” involves installing some text-to-speech software. (What? You didn’t think I was going to use my own voice for this, did you?) I selected Sayz Me for my first trial. (If you want to try this at home, you’ll want to use this page for the “download text-to-speech components” part, ‘cause Sayz Me’s copy of the speech API and of the synthetic voices are hosted on the slowest server I’ve ever had the displeasure of trying to download from.)

    So far so good, though I’m experiencing major flashbacks to good old SAM back in the Apple II & Commodore 64 days…