Category: Geekery

Mouse Identification Training
The product is called “VMware.” It is, in effect, a server that allows you to host a number of virtual computers on a single machine. The geek value for something like this is through the roof, which makes the following instructions found in the upgrade documentation terribly amusing.
8. Select your mouse.

Here are some helpful mouse identification hints:
- If the connector is round, your mouse is a PS/2 or a Bus mouse.
- If the connector is trapezoidal with nine holes, it is a serial mouse.
- If the connector is a flat rectangle with a slot, it is a USB mouse.
I’ll grant you that their instructions are wholly accurate. However, I question the judgement of the person who thinks (s)he has any business at all installing or upgrading a sophisticated piece of software but doesn’t know how to tell one type of pointing device from another!
17 July, 2006
Bizarre Coincidence, Wot?

This week marks the 17th anniversary of my arrival in Portland. I moved here from Concrete, WA when I was 17 years old, so I’ve made the Rose City my home for an entire half of my life now. Before Concrete (the town in which I spent my senior year) I spent a brief time in Anacortes, WA preceeded by another brief stint in Des Moines, WA. Oddly enough, my girlfriend currently lives in Des Moines, albeit not on a small boat like I did. My junior year (and my absolute favorite year of school, ever) was spent in Bellevue, WA and my sophomore year took place in Kent, WA.

We moved to Kent from Hillsboro, OR after Mom hooked up with her newest husband at the time. Now, here’s where it gets weird. I attended Poynter Middle School, located just off Cornell Road. Our apartment was right across Cornell from the school’s athletic field. (I used to watch Robotech in the morning until the moment the credits rolled, at which point I’d grab my things and scamper at high speed so as not to be late for school.)

Yesterday I started work at Resource One, which is located… well, let’s just say it’s incredibly close. Check this out:

(Image courtesy of Google Maps, with minor edits by Yours Truly)

The green arrow is my current workplace. The blue arrow marks the approximate location (it was a long time ago, so maybe I got the wrong building) of the apartment that Mom, Sis and I lived in… about twenty years ago. The purple arrow indicates the middle school I attended at that time. (For reference, if you could “scroll” the image above so you could see what’s just off to the right, you’d find the Hillsboro airport.)

Consider that I’ve barely set foot in Hillsboro more than a couple of times since I moved away, and then consider that I’m now working a figurative stone’s throw from where I used to live. Freaky, isn’t it?

6 July, 2006
Highly Motivated

This’ll be it for today. That’s not a guarantee that I will (or won’t) make more tomorrow, mind you.

First up we have a trio of posters inspired by City of Heroes screenshots I found on my computer. I hope that the humor is accessible for non-gaming folks:

The last entry for today has a bit of backstory. If you don’t know how I came to be “the little grey duck,” the following poster may confuse you:

When I was a teenager, one of my favorite phrases was “not this little grey duck!” It got to the point where people began calling me “ducky,” which (of course) caused me to drop that catchphrase like a hot rock. The damage, however, was done. The “ducky” has been following me around ever since. When the Internet Age began, however, after bumping up against a few all-too-popular pop-culture nickname choices, that “little grey duck” came to mind after long consideration and… the rest, as they say, is history.

It’s all about turning lemons into lemonade, right?

29 June, 2006
More Motivation

Y’all should know better than to encourage me, you know.

Rehabilitation is anime-themed, but I don’t think you don’t need to be an “otaku” to get a laugh out of it.

Mementos is based, oddly enough, on a serious bit of rumination.

Obsession may go over some folks’ heads. Suffice to say that I used to take my music collecting very seriously.

I have the sick, sad feeling that I’m not done yet. I should also get off my lazy kiester and put these into the gallery where they belong… if I do, I’ll redact this and the other entry accordingly. (Edit: Done! Thumbnails! Woo-hoo!)

29 June, 2006
I’m enthusiastic. How about you?

Take one down-and-out computer geek, add one good-quality image from one of his current favorite anime series, mix using an all-too-cool online tool, and what do you get?

I don’t know about you, but I’m enthusiastic about the results.

Okay. It’s your turn now… you know you wanna.

(Edited to add: One more before bedtime.)

(Probably more to follow during the next few days. You’ve been warned.)

28 June, 2006
All platforms, eh?

Craigslist, usually a treasure trove of job postings, is almost a dry well this week. One of the very few recent entries in the main category I check even turned out to be, let’s say, miscategorized. (“Work from home! Type things for us!” Er, no.)

And then we have what might have looked to be an interesting job opportunity…

Part of the technical support team for a state-wide data communications network connecting WAN to LANs.

Been there, done that. It’s a contract gig, but if that’s what it takes to put food on the table…

The team is responsible for network security, disaster and recovery, video, voice and data communications, protocols, software and hardware products and peripherals…

Neat. Sounds like a well-rounded JOAT kind of gig. Just what I’m looking for!

…that run on all platforms including Mainframe,…

You don’t capitalize that, sir. It’s not a proper name, it’s a generic noun. So what type of platform is it? Inquiring ~~minds~~ jobseekers want to know.

…Microsoft Exchange,…

This is correctly named in the posting, but whether it’s a “platform” is a ~~flamewar~~ discussion best left to people with more idle time than myself.

…Microsoft Windows XP…

Also correctly named, this is only a “platform” at the desktop level. Consider this not so much a boneheaded selection but more as a part of the pattern to be revealed.

…and Microsoft Server 2000.

Aha! I now know their definition of “platform.” It’s “anything with an M at the start of its name.” Problem is, they named this wrong. It’s Windows 2000 Server.

Here’s the thing. If you’re advertising “all platforms,” you might want to include concrete examples of platforms that don’t originate in Redmond, Washington. No UNIX or variants and derivatives are listed, no Mac, nothing but the mysterious “Mainframe”…

Duties: […] Configure client software, i.e. ODBC drivers, Outlook and Exchange e-mail access, protocols, adapters, and TN3270 host emulation.

…which I suspect is an IBM AS/400 (great merciful heavens, why not just say so?) based on that TN3270 emulation notation. This makes me wonder why they’re not using 5250 instead, though.

Of course I’ll never know, because…

This position requires a valid driver’s license. Travel throughout the state may be required.

In this instance, I think it’s for the best. Don’t you?

16 June, 2006